I was reading through my journal earlier today and was struck by an entry from a year ago in which I documented a dream I’d had. After re-reading the entry this morning, I can still recall the dream and how it haunted me for weeks afterwards.
Here is an excerpt from my journal dated 1/28/11:
“A few weeks ago- a month ago?- I had a dream. This was after the decision to travel, the blog started, etc. After the ball started rolling, so to speak. It’s been a few weeks so my recollection is foggy, yet it’s strange that I remember it at all, I rarely remember my dreams.
I was sitting in a theater in the audience, watching a play. Surrounding me were actors in the play who had roles in other scenes, and I did too. I had a role in the next scene. Sitting there, I started to panic. I panicked that I didn’t know my lines. I had to get up there next and I didn’t remember my lines! I didn’t have a copy of the script. Had I forgotten it? I began whispering to the other actors around me, asking them if they had a script I could look at. I tapped the girl in front of me and asked, she begrudgingly passed me her copy. I was freaking out. I had to get up on stage any second and even with the script I didn’t have time to memorize all of my lines. I don’t remember what happened next. I don’t remember if I got on stage or if the dream ended before then.
But here’s the interesting part of the dream. The whole time the dream was playing out, there was a voice inside me, inside my dream self, saying ‘Relax, Kim, you know how to do this. The lines are inside of you, just trust that they will come.’ My dream self was too afraid to put faith in it, but my dream soul was saying: Step on stage and the words will appear.”
Photo by Gamma-Ray Productions, Flickr Creative Commons